


To Grieve What She Thought She Had

by Alaxamber



Series: Laserblast's Perplexity [1]
Category: OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes
Genre: Betaed, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Cute Mr. Gar, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gardening, Gene & Carol, Gene is the best, Heroes to Villains, M/M, Slice of Life, Soul-Searching, Thought Projection, Time to reflect, Was Laser Cheating? Did he care? Did he see it that way?, Was Laserblast allways a Villain?, self-harm mentioned but very very briefly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:49:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26686936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alaxamber/pseuds/Alaxamber
Summary: Time off for Carol and Eugene came rarely, even more so did their days off line up. During this rare day off though, her mind seems to be swimming with memories of her past with Laserblast after recent happenings with the reveal of K.O.'s father still being alive.Was he always a Villain and she just missed the warning signs?
Relationships: Carol/Eugene "Gar" Garcia, Carol/Laserblast (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes), Laserblast/Lad Boxman (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heros), Lord Boxman/Laserblast (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes), Lord Boxman/Professor Venomous (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes), Silversparks/Laserblast (OK K.O.! Let's Be Heros)
Series: Laserblast's Perplexity [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949647
Comments: 8
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi peeps so this is finished. If you are seeing this pop back up it is due to this change. There are new parts of Laserblast's sides and some teasers for the next to parts that are just in the wings for a few more edits.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Laserblast's side to this has been posted!

CHAPTER 1

Carol sat in the small kitchen of her trailer as she and Mr. Gar enjoyed a quiet afternoon. KO was off on some secret mission and none of the new Bodega employees wanted to bother their boss as much as the last set had. 

She sighed and looked down at the light brown mixture in her cup, "You know Gene, I should have known something was going on…." Her voice was soft and thoughtful, yet the silence that followed meant her lover had no clue what she meant. "With Laserblast 11-18 years ago," she sighed again and took a drink before leaning back on the thin chair.

"Oh, that," he looked both equal parts relieved, interested in the conversation. "Well, you can't always tell."

"Really? You never saw it? " she asked and leaned back further retrieving her cup to take another drink.

"No, I didn't expect it from him. He was an amazing Hero, and it’s sad when hardships turn them to the dark side." The bulky male shook his head, he looked down at his own cup and sipped. 

"Well, you can still be a hero and- " she clicked her ring on the cup in her hands in a slow rhythm as she kept thinking, "I am sure you can still be a Hero and be queer? Right, Enid and Redhue seem very happy together, and are doing great with their Hero Missions."

Gene's eyes had widened and he swallowed the larger drink than he anticipated, "Queer?" He asked his brows tight, "I thought you meant him being a Villain." He laughed with his normal insecurity, "I don't think your preference has anything to do with it, I never meant to imply-" He continued his discomfort clear as he busied himself with taking another drink. 

Carol laughed softly at his discomfort, an easy smile coming to her face as she let the front two legs of her chair clack back onto the floor. She reached out to softy touch his hand, a smile pulled at her lips, "I know you don't think that. Neither do I. No one is a villain or evil on that merit." She ran a thumb over the back of his hand. 

"Oh good." He gave a meek laugh and drained the rest of his cup. "I- to tell the truth I tried my best to ignore you both when… when things got further." He shifted in his chair.

"I remember that you never signed up for any of the patrols with us," her smile had faltered and curled down in a soft frown. "I had thought you were just being sweet, no one else wanted to do the patrols because Laser hated how they got in the way," she looked over at the small window over the sink. 

"Now though I think it was his jealousy of the powers, mine is only as strong as those around me." One more sigh had her draining her cup and leaving the empty porcelain on the table between them. "On patrol, he was one way, strong and charismatic. He knew how to control a battlefield, and how to direct his squad." She smiled almost dreamily, as her eyes seemed to unfocus as she was pulled back into memory. 

-

"Sparks! Quick, before they get to the door" his voice was a loud yell as they rang. The sound of sirens blasting from the bank. Other teams had been dispatched and she later found out when news of the Villain reached other duos or teams they laughed and left the low level to them. She nodded and doubled her speed, while she watched him run the back way. 

Finally when she had entered the bank, having had to wade through the crowds most of the hostages were gone, escaped thanks to the huge hole that was now in the wall. The sound of large gears could be heard and as she suspected it was Lad Boxman's horrible Junk fish.

The only thing they seemed good for was property damage. She could hear noises? coming from the vault but the huge metal ball of gears turned its huge eyes on her, she knew her partner would have to handle himself for a while. 

The junkfish turned into a pile of rubble after a few well-placed kicks, and elbows. 

Oddly she could no longer hear the sounds of a scuffle in the back of the bank, with her lip firmly bitten she moved with ease over the broken ceiling and into the back, “Laserblast?” she called into the darkened hallway. 

Even the last time the bank had been attacked the backup generators had kept the emergency lights on, but not now. “Laserblast are you alright?” she yelled again but as she tried to pick up her speed she stumbled over some of the rhubarb that stuck in the huge pieces of ceiling that had fallen. She coughed as more dust settled as another piece of wall fell, after catching her breath she yelled again, still no answer.

With her heart pounding she pushed further into the bank, moving quickly until she could hear a further scuffle of sounds, she took a deep breath her back on the wall just before a doorway she could hear the scuffle on the other side. Quickly going over the lists of fighting styles she nodded and turned yelling, “Laserblast!” she ran into the room only to find Laser on his side, his arms tied behind him, and what looked to be a gag in his mouth. He looked up toward her as he struggled against the bonds to pull himself into a seated position. 

“Oh Sliversparks,” called the cheerful short villain, Boxman had a bag with a huge $ on the front and was climbing up onto a desk that did not appear to belong. “So good of you to finally join us!” he cackled as he finally came to sit on the desk. “I am sure Laser-baby here will have some... Fun explaining. * he cackled again as the large rockets started on either side of the desk.

“Lad Boman! Drop the bag!” she yelled. She looked between the mostly hidden face of Laser, his mouth movined against the gag, his body struggling against the bounds, and the short male on the desk. Her choice was made though as Boxman grinned and lifted a remote, she could faintly see that one button was small and while it could have been the shadow it looked to be pink? But the other and the bigger button had a large skull and crossbones.

“Now now Silversparks. I could let him go, or I can have more fun!” he cackled again and pressed the large button, the building began to rumble and Sparks found herself between the choice of saving Laser from what she thought was going to be the building collapsing, or going after Lad Boxman. The choice was easy for her as she ran, jumped, and pushed Laserblast back onto his back, covering his body with her own.

The rumble had really been a set of bombs going off under the Vault, and the huge metal container fell through the floor into the sewers, as Lad Boxman flew off on a rather surprising well-rigged flying desk.

“Mhmm, mhmm,” Laser grunted from behind the gag, struggling as he tried to pull his arms out from beneath both himself and her weight.

“Oh, sorry Laserblast…” her voice was soft as she reached up and pulled the gag away, he gasped for breath, his cheeks were dark red, and his lips looked to be darker than normal as well, “Are you ok?” she asked, worry still heavy in her voice as she laid over him.

“Yeah Sparks, but my arms are stuck, and you are…” a smirk pulled up the side of his lips as he cocked his head down to look at their bodies.

“Oh cob! I am so sorry Laser!” she said as she tried to scramble up after him, at one point as she tried to find a good place to place her legs, she could feel a surprising hardness on her thigh. A blush flushed her face as she pulled herself up and off of him, “J-Just turnaround and I will untie you.” She said trying to clear her mind and throat as she tried to not sneak a peek at what may have been poking her.

“You sure you want to untie me?” He teased in an easy reply. Heat flared again on her face as she was crouched behind him. 

“Well, You can’t do much tied up,“ She flirted back, her bottom lip caught in her teeth, as she slowed her efforts to undo the ropes. “Need your hands don’t you?”

The laugh he gave in reply was loud, he looked back and over his shoulder, his lips still pulled up into an easy smirk, “Don’t need those for what I am good at.”

“Oh,” her voice was flustered and she finished the last knot, making a mental note that while his name was Boxman, he was really good at knots. “Well, maybe after a dinner, you could show me?” She asked and did not stand, her eyes stared down at the ropes and she held her breath waiting for the easy letdown, he had been known for with other teammates. 

Laserblast turned, stretching his arms up over his head, his shoulders popped with a satisfied groan. He cocked his head as he looked over at her, she felt like he was inspecting her before he gave another carefree smile, “Sure Sparks, Half the team thinks we are already stealing kisses when no one is looking.” he stood whipping his hands off on his knees then whipping off the seat of his pants. “So tomorrow, after swing patrol?” 

~

“Carol?” The voice was the soft and meek one voice of Mr. Gar. The change from what she remembered Laser’s being and the male sitting across from here where jarring. Laser barely acted unsure of himself.

“Sorry honey, I was…” she looked for the words as she cleared her throat rocking in her seat.

“I could see your thought bubble, Carol,” he reminded her with a smile under his thick mustache, and she felt her cheeks flair with embarrassment. “You can miss him, Carol,” he said simply. she looked up at his face, it told her he wanted to say more but was containing himself.

“Not miss…” she mused for a moment and gave him another smile standing and pushing away from the table, “I think I will work in the garden for a bit,” she gave her lover a smile as she walked to his side of the table. With a wink, she added, “So my thoughts won't bother your rare day off.”


	2. Chapter 2

In front of her was the small flower bed she had begun when KO had been old enough to play outside without constant supervision. A smile stayed on her lips and she began to work her hands into the soil, her mind slipping back into the memories and train of thought she had left at the table.

  


-

  


“Sparks, good of you to join us!” his voice was more of a laugh as he held the short male under him. Laser was sitting on the Villain’s lower back, his hand tight on the other’s arm pinned up by his shoulder. “Did Foxtail send you?” he asked with a cock to his head, both Heros ignoring the struggling captive. “Just got Boxman to shut up!” his face broke into a bigger grin as he used his free hand to lift the Villain's head up to show a gag, much like Laser had had a few weeks ago.

  


“Uh, yeah, I got Critical Point’s robot taken down and Foxtail is chasing Cosma as we speak.” Her head now mimicked Laser’s as she looked at the pair with a bit of confusion on her face. “Are you going to let him up so we can go and book him at POINT?” 

  


“Oh. Yeah, of course.” Another carefree laugh as Laserblast found his feet and stood in a fluid motion, lifting the short male with ease to set him on his feet. “Alright, let's go Box,” he said as he opened another candy from his pocket and placed a hand on the short male’s shoulder. Only to then move with quick efficiency to cuff the Villain. Sparks found a smile pulling at her lips as she felt Laser's gaze, a smile playing on his own.

  


Lad Boxman’s human eye flicked from Sparks and over his shoulder looking up at Laser, he tried to say something but the gag seemed to be working as the only sounds escaping were grunts with no way of telling what the words were intended to be. Boxman struggled again as Laserblast pushed on his shoulder to get him to walk. Sparks noticed the shorter Villain's face was flushed and wondered for a moment just how long Laser had been sitting on his back as the pair began moving past her.

  


“I am sure he can’t blow up anything with just words,” she said, falling into step with Laserblast, her eyes hard on the evil do-er in front of them. She frowned for a moment, jiggling the communicator in her ear at the sudden static feedback.

  


“Ah, but Sparks,” he laughed from around the artificial sugar pop in his cheek. “So much quieter with the gag!” He gave her an easy smile and made no attempt to remove it. 

  


A mumble and a grunt came from the shorter male, a quip of means if Sparks had any insight. “Shut it,  _ Lad  _ Boxman, your flying desk can’t help you escape now!” With a laugh he held up the same remote she had seen last time, or at least she thought that it was the same. The small pink button was depressed this time, and she could tell it was an almost electric pink. The short male looked over his shoulder, but due to his size and that he was looking over the opposite side, she could not see the look he had given her partner. 

  


“Come on, he is already having a hard time breathing, at least this way he won't pass out before we get to the team.” She said with a frown on her lips, her eyes looking over the Villain again. She could see sweat soaking through the back of his shirt and could hear his breath coming hard and fast from his nose.

  


Laserblast looked at her, or at least she believed he did. His helmet made it impossible to read his expression except for the smile that pulled at his lips, the small paper stick poking out from one side. “Oh alright, Sparks. But it’s your fault if his desk is voice-controlled,” he said with a shrug. With easy steps he moved forward and easily undid the gag pulling it back and away, shoving it into his pocket instead of tossing it in the trashcan they walked by. 

  


The short male did not use the excuse to say anything, hell he was even quieter as they walked. The sound of an explosion in front of them had Sparks ready and bouncing on her toes. 

  


“Laser, you keep a hold of him, I am going to run ahead.” She gave him a smile as he started to make a comment, but his voice was cut off as Lad Boxman took a full stop in front of him, causing the tall male to nearly fall over the hunched form. Boxman had leant forward, his hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath. 

  


“Let him sit, maybe get him some water too, no need for him to up and die before we finish. We might not show quarters in the field, but we are not monsters.” She gave her boyfriend a carefree smile and jogged away only sparing a glance at the other male, with a yell of “I can come to get you when the battle is over!”

  


“Sparks!” Laser yelled and looked like he wanted to fight her on the subject. But she was already halfway down the road, and only gave him a wave of her hand. 

  


-

  


Carol sighed as she sat up back on her heels. Her hands were dirty with soil but she did not wipe them on her thighs, only rested them on her knees. She looked over at her van sitting in the one car driveway. A frown pulled on her lips as she continued to think.

  


Had he always shown his pretension to take things too far? He had always been the one to tackle the villain, to struggle with them close up, unlike the rest of the team who had their powers to make close combat unnecessary. Laserblast would kick and punch, take down the other with just his stamina over their powers. Something she had found attractive back in the day, a hands-on approach that many others chose not to. But again this was only a certain few villains, he would hang back with Mistress Vine or laugh instead of pulling Princess of Pain away from her when she was pinned. 

  


Their romance has stayed rather chaste for the first month, even after the heavy flirting on the field and during their dates; Laser would avoid offering her back to his room, saying he had plans or other sudden obligations. Sparks had not been playing hard to get, the first date she had even gone without panties expecting him to make good of the promises back in the bank. Yet after leaving with nothing even close to a kiss she wore more comfortable styles of dress for the next few dates, still leaving every option open for him to take it to where he had teased more than once it could go.

  


It was nearly four dates in when Sparks had finally gotten up the nerve to make the first move and kiss him. She could still remember the taste of cherries and berries on his lips. At the time Sparks had thought it was cute, he had been flustered when she pushed him against the wall next to his door, his face a dark red, and did not look in her direction until she had pulled his face free from his helmet and kissed him senseless.

  


A smile came to her lips as she slipped down into a sitting position, groaning as she stretched out her knees, before scooting down the flowerbed to pull more weeds. 

  


When they kissed, he seemed to be in the moment, yet before she could try and move things into the bedroom he broke it. In a show of unease, he rubbed his neck as he said he forgot something then took off. 

  


She could count the times they had been close to intimate in their nearly one year together on both hands, and the time when they were actually fully physically intimate, on one finger.

  


At the time, it was put on many factors: stress, his lack of powers, his ever-growing need to be better. Things in hindsight, that they should have been able to work on. Things she had tried to work on while they fought and bickered about the right way to fight a Villian when he would complain that Foxy took away his chance to really make a Villain pay, things that should have been a red flag long before they had tried to make it work in the bedroom.

  


-

  


“Laser, please. I just want to spend the night here with you…” Her voice was soft as she looked up through her thick lashes. She bit at her lip and blinked slowly up at him, her large brown eyes sparkling in a way to show her enlarged pupils, her plush lips pushed into a pout.

  


“No Sparks, not tonight.” He chuckled with a smile pulling at his lips, his cheeks had a soft flush of red to them, they had just had a rather intense make-out session in front of his door again. “My room is a mess, and I know you would hate to see the state.” he laughed with his hand on his door handle behind him.

  


“Then come back to mine, Foxtail sleeps like the dead…” She pouted again. Sure, she knew it would be rude, but it wasn’t like the tall female hadn't brought back her own fair share for other Heros to their shared room and left Sparks locked outside of the room. No, it was some time for some payback. The idea brought a smile to her pouting lips.

  


“No, I couldn’t Sparks.” He gave her another charming smile as he touched her cheek, his dark-rimmed eyes, soft as he leaned forward, but instead of catching her lips in another kiss, he touched her forehead with his lips instead. “What would Foxtail say?"

  


“By Cob, who cares what she will say.” She pouted further, stomping her foot in a show of frustration. “I am starting to think you are a bunch of talk and nothing to back it up.” She said plainly her gaze leveling with the tall male.

  


“Nothing to back it up?” His voice was low, and his dark brow was arched high. A thrill of excitement had gone through her when she had seen it, she should have known that teasing would get him into the bedroom. “I could have you singing before your boots hit the floor.” His voice was a low growl as he leaned forward. Sparks did her best to not back down, she was a Hero, and a damn horny one at that. 

  


“All words and no action make Sparks a sad girl…” She pouted again looking up at him. She leaned her body against his, enjoying the feel of his muscles pressed against her. The dress shirt he had worn out to barely seemed to fit over the bulk of them. Her hands came up in a way that she knew would make her bosom pop out of the tight top, and ran them along his upper chest. “That is, unless you don’t think you can handle me,” another slow blink, a swipe of her tongue on her bottom lip caught his eyes and she did it again with a smile playing on them the second time.

  


He growled out something then, his hand unlatched the door, but before she could ask him to repeat himself his hands were on her waist and she was lifted in the air and pulled back into his room. 

  


-

  


Carol shivered as she lost herself in her memories. Her bottom lip was nearly purple from where she had been biting it.

  


-

  


He had been amazing, every bit what he offered, but still not the complete deal. He had tossed her on his bed in an almost pitch-black room, the faint glow of red light from a clock offered no help as she sat up and reached for him, “Laser, I can’t see anything, why were you so worried about the mess?” There was laughter in her voice, as she continued, “Well my boots are on the floor and I ain’t singing yet.” 

  


“You will be.” The voice was barely above a growl, and it surprised her with how close he sounded. She reached out and found a belt buckle, she could feel herself smiling up at him, and squeaked in surprise when she felt a hand on her shoulder. A push sent her laying back and a pair of hands on her knees told her exactly what he planned.

  


Efficient, would be the best term for his…plan. He knew how to work her body, nearly better than she did and in the hour she spent on his bed she had never felt so worshiped. Her body had been on fire and every moment he had sent even more pleasure through her. 

  


Sure, she had thought it was odd that finally after begging for him to join her up on the bed, he had laughed and leaned over her, giving her a kiss before he pulled back. “No, I just had a point to prove.” There was a quality to his voice that she had not heard before. 

  


“Laser? What do you mean?” she asked. Sure, she was tired and her body felt like mush, but she could return the favor. “ I am more than willing to go one more time, just have to get a condom.” She offered and heaved herself up into a seated position, her hands reaching out to find where he had moved off to.

  


“No Sparks, I enjoyed myself enough getting you off.” He chuckled and she felt his hand in hers. “Come on, let's get you back to your room before Foxtail starts to worry.” His voice was smooth, and even in her satisfied state, she could feel the heat the voice caused to build back up in her lower stomach.

  


"If you're sure Laser.." Her voice was soft and to her own ears husky and low, the kind her ex loved hearing her use. But the kiss on her forehead and the low chuckle, coupled with the fact his hand was in hers and was pulling her to the door, she knew he would not give in. He stopped at the door opening it and with a soft hand on her lower back, pushed her from the room.

  


"G'night Sparks, we need to be up in a few hours." He gave her another one of his charming smiles and closed the door before she could get another word in.

  


-

  


Yeah, now that she looked back on it, many of their romps had ended like that, her the only one receiving, and him just saying he took his fill. Back then, she thought he was just being…well selfless? 

  


She leaned back looking over the weeded flower bed, a frown on her face now as she began to do something she hadn't in a long while. 

  


She compared her ex to her current, something she had told herself she would never do. Hell, she had believed up until her and Gene had started dating, that her love had gone the way Laserblast had. So there would have been no one to compare. 

  


Gene, however, could not keep his hands off of her. In the first week he had her begging him to stay the night, and his only reason for saying no was that KO was home, and he felt awkward. That lasted about a month into summer. Then, once he stayed over, he never wanted to leave. 

  


He always showed how much he wanted to touch her or help her, his hand on the small of her back, soft kisses when he walked by, helping with any meal, getting feminine supplies when they had a surprise visitor one night. Nothing Laser had even come close to doing. 

  


Sure Laser had kissed her in public, held her arm at events but never went out of his way to show he wanted her around. He would act surprised when she hugged him, squeamish if she tried to get a little too close when another team member was near.

  


Well, at least most of the other team, when El-bow was near he would act possessive; an arm around her hips, a hand on the back of her neck or making sure to give her his open and sucked on a sucker. 

  


Carol found herself frowning, the anger she felt over the situation came back. Had Laser only acted that way to get back at Gene? Just to rub their relationship in his face? She shook her head, no. There was no way the Laserblast she knew would act like that.Though, could that have been Shadowy? How long had he kept that…curse on himself? Did it only appear when he was going through his apparent physical changes or were there other signs the dark being and feeling had always been there? Was his lust for power from Shadowy or was that just Laserblast? 

  


"How could I have missed so many signs?" She asked herself as she leaned forward and rubbed at her forehead, leaving a small bit of dirt behind. As she moved once more she felt the strain in her lower stomach, the burn in her inner thighs, feelings she had become well accustomed to after Gene became a normal fixture in her's and KO's home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp there was chapter 2 hope you guys are enjoying this. Super hard not to just spam post the completed story lol. So what do you think? Is Laserblast just acting odd? Is he truely distracted or just not feeling it? Let me know what you think. Leave a <3 if you want to leave an extra kudo♡


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some fluff for Gene and Carol♡ they deserve it.

CHAPTER 3

Their seventh date was interrupted by Lad Boxman who had attacked the bank next to the restaurant they were currently eating in. The time between their dates had been a long one and had both finally taken the night off. Yet, instead of calling the other team members, like she had begged him too, he laughed and asked “And miss a chance for action?” 

She had found herself suddenly alone in the eatery, looking around with a dark blush on her cheeks as the other diners stole quick glances and spoke in hushed tones. The thirty minutes of waiting felt like hours, but finally Laserblast came back, his face flushed from fighting, his button-down disheveled and his hair had the telltale signs of helmet wear. He had laughed and said that Boxman had gotten away, and that he was no longer hungry. Instead, telling the waiter with a wide carefree smile, that he would take his dinner to go, and asked for an extra serving of chocolate cake to go. 

She had believed the night ruined, but as they walked back to HQ, Laser stopped them, a smile pulling his lips wide.

"Hey Sparks, you know how you are always offering?" He asked, his smile had turned more into a smirk, as her face darkened with embarrassment, "Would that offer still stand now?" 

How could she say no to such a face? They had snuck into the alley nearby, her excitement making her body vibrate as she thought he would ravish her, finally. Would she get something more than hands or his skillful mouth, in a dirty alley? Well, if it's his kink she was willing to try it, if anything to at least finally get him off. 

Though she had expected to leave happy and well fucked, she instead left with a sore throat and cum in her hair. He had not looked at her, kept his eyes closed as he kept a fistful of her hair, and told her to keep it in. There was no praise for her, he only cursed about how good it felt, and did not offer to return the favor when they got back to HQ, choosing instead to give her one of his charming smiles and leave her in the hallway. 

-

That walk of shame….Carol frowned and sat forward looking up at the house. Never, as she snuck from her and Gene's room to the bathroom, cum running down her thigh, did she ever feel like it was a walk of shame. It hurt her heart that that was now the description she would give that night. It really hadn't felt like that….did it? 

She huffed another sigh and rubbed at her eyes. How could she have been so blind? Like really…that blind? She stood and brushed off her pants, the bits of dirt that clung made her smile. Bending to pick up her basket of weeds, she heard the front door open and her lovers' low whistle. While he was still as shy as ever, and bad with his words more often than not, he had his way. 

Carol turned and held the basket behind her. "Oh you. Stop that." She laughed through her embarrassment as well as the spark of heat his attention gave her. "Am I too loud out here too?" She asked with a downturn to her head, the laughter in the first reply gone in the second.

"No, not at all Carol." His gruff voice was soft and comforting and made the despair she had felt a few moments ago not seem as overwhelming. "Just wanted to see if you were alright, or if you needed a drink?" He took the few steps down onto the soft grass, and she noticed he had a glass of what looked to be lemonade in hand.

"Oh sure, it has been warm today." She agreed but found that she had no idea what the temperature had felt like the entire time she had been weeding. She then noticed that her arms were sore, and sweat had made her headband heavy. She took the glass and drank deeply from it, surprised as the bits of ice that she had not managed swallowed clinked on her nose. "Oh, I was really thirsty by the looks of this." She laughed as she handed the glass back. "Thank you Sweet one, I am going to go to the back and put these in the compost. I should be in soon." She walked to her tall partner and leaned upwards. 

Almost instantly his arm was around her waist and he bent down to give her three quick kisses. Something she enjoyed quite a bit. If he was leaving for the day: Three quick kisses. Leaving to clean himself up? Three quick kisses. Walking away to go into the back yard? Well, three kisses, and maybe a few more after his arm tightened around her hips holding her in his strong embrace. 

"Are you sure you are alright?" Gene asked with a slight frown, his warm brown eyes just peeking over the aviators he always wore. 

With a slow breath through her nose she looked down and away, and for a moment just breathed. She could feel his anxiety start, but at the soft touch of her hand on his arm and her eyes meeting his, it began to wane. 

"Yes, my love." A smile pulled at her lips but she felt there was still a sadness to her eyes, "Finally taking the time…to grieve something I thought I had." She cleared her throat and rubbed at her eyes, she had not expected to tear up like she had but Gene didn't mention it, he just leaned down for three more kisses, one on the tip of her nose and a final squeeze around her waist. 

"Take your time, the shade is nice back there. I will bring you another glass of lemonade?" The final bit of the sentence had turned into more of a question as Carol shook her head, and chewed at her lip.

"I have a few more… things to go over, and I really don't think you want to see those" She pulled herself away from his grasp, leaving a squeeze on his upper arm. "I will be in before long, I won't waste our whole day together." Guilt now tightened her belly. 

"Carol, you are not ruining our day." His voice was firm as he lifted her face and gave her a smile. "You are taking some time you need, and if that is how we spend all day, I will know we did something you needed to do. " 

With his small piece said, he gave her one more kiss on the nose and climbed back into the trailer. 

That was the man who was going to be her husband. The warmth that filled her chest told her so. He was who she should have spent the last 11 to 18 years with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 🥺 whatdo you guys think? I know I am making Laser Look like a twat but I also feel him and Sparks were not all she thought it was. More so if he can just yeet himself so far into that. But it does seem like he has a "throw it away until I am better" atittude. Anyways what do you think? You guys wanna see Laser's side of things too? We are nearly doe here. With a chance of a special 5th chapter. (That one is sad)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are. The final. Was ganna cut that end into a 5th chapter but then it just felt too small. So here ya go♡

CHAPTER 4

No, that's not completely true. She walked to the backyard, the basket swinging by her side. If her and Laser hadn't happened, she wouldn't have KO, and even though he came from someone who could apparently lie to her nearly everyday, she had never and would never blame him for his father's actions. Of course, that leads to the question of if she had known earlier would she have reacted differently? Could she have dealt with the pain of losing him sooner?

Carol shook her head as she sat down on the plastic chair, relief washed over her as she was surprised by how good it felt to sit down in a chair. She then began to work on tearing the weeds, before tossing them into the barrel they used for compost. 

Her memories flicked through the few other times she had been nearly intimate with Laser. Times they fought together all went the same, he had never had an indication that he wanted to turn and join the other team. The intimate times though, the times she thought she truly connected with the male, well these hurt more, stood out more. 

There was the time in the alley after the movies, they had gone and seen some new hero fick, she had no interest and had gotten bored halfway through it. She took the chance and tried for a little more during the movie, and by Cob's blessing it seemed to work. Alright so action got his …heh…laser going. 

His excitement as they watched had worn off on her, and being pushed up against the wall, behind some factory in the middle of Neon Riot city, just fueled her enthusiastic response.

That time had ended with her bent to the wall, her pants pulled partly down her thighs exposing her butt, and him rutting into her from behind. He had kept himself from out of her underwear, and pulled away as she had requested when he came, told her not to move and to hold her cheeks out of the way. She used to blame herself for not carrying a condom on herself, and after that day always used to.

A blush had come over her at the memory. With a sigh she wiped at her eyes, looking to the next. Oh, this one hurt. It was her birthday. He had promised her, over one of their many only first base nights, that on her birthday he would finally have time for them to have fun again. He cleared the whole night for her, even bought tickets to a play. They had been halfway through when a loud boom exploded outside. Yet again, the bank next door was attacked. 

Relaxing back she closed her eyes. He had come back in the theater, barely a scratch on him. He was grumpy, said that the Villain had… not been up to a fight or something. She couldn't remember clearly, far too interested in the play. The end of the play was marked by Laserblast snoring in the seat next to her, grumbling things she wished she could have made out. They left with only slightly red cheeks when he had awoken during the last number as the music had begun to die. 

With quick steps and little conversation they ate dinner and when they found their way back upstairs… no matter how or what they tried, he could not keep it up. At the time, she blamed the Villain for ruining the night, but… no that was Laser who chose to do that. 

Her nose twitched in anger as she tore a few of the weeds rather violently. Why could he not just tell her? Why did he have to play her so fucking well? He really was the Villain in her story. And it hurt a bit more knowing she had no idea. 

Why had he never felt like she was good enough to just say, "Hey Sparks, I don’t think I am into all this." She laughed as she tried to mimic her old played out memory of Laserblast's voice. No…he had to do something, far worse.

He had decided to _not_ tell POINT that he was the Villain they were searching for. He instead had chosen to leave the day after they had finally been fully intimate. Somehow they had made it work, and he was amazing. Nothing of that night had failed to bring a blush to her cheeks or heat to her stomach, well before nothing failed. 

Now though, as she looked it over with a fine-tooth comb… things stood out. 

She had thought they had managed three times that night. That somehow, whatever hurdle he had been running towards was finally over. Yet… now as she thought, perhaps he had just been a very good actor for one of those times. 

The first she was sure of, wincing as she shook her head at the memory. He had shoved himself so roughly into her throat, that his cum squirted out her nose. Cob, how sorry he acted afterward, helping clean her up and into the shower. They had then gone back to bed.. where he slowly worked her back up. She had always seen that as his… apology, every moment as he kissed, licked, and sucked every inch of her. 

A soft sob came from her as she covered her mouth. A slow breath huffed between her fingers after a few moments. Slowly her breathing calmed and she sat back again, wiping once more at her eyes. She had no idea if he had tried in earnest to do what he did, or if he had finally wanted…Cob knows what he wanted, but that night he had taken what he needed from her. 

She reached down and ran her hand over her lower stomach, over the small scar that KO's C-section had left. They had thought they caught it all. Any bits of what his insistence that she try anal had left behind. A few weeks later, after he was gone, she had been sick. Then came the positive test. Another slow long breath came to bring her back into the present and out of her memories.

Would any of these questions have answers? Should she even seek him out to ask or would these be better just…forgotten? 

Carol sat forward rubbing her face and took a long breath. She then straightened up, slapping her palms on her knees. She did not need answers. Life had been what it had been. Scars had been left, insecurities she now realized had stemmed from the interactions she had once thought so differently about. It felt like a heavy weight had been lifted as she stood and turned to the home she shared with the two most important people in her life

And that's what she needed, more than Venomous' excuses. More than a suddenly-reformed-back-to-what-she-remembered Laserblast. No, too many years she lived in 'what ifs', and now that she had finally allowed Gene to make his move, to show her what he had been offering all those years ago, she wanted nothing and no one to stop it. 

With a smile, she stood from her lawn hair and stretched. Time to make the most of what she had left. 

* * *

***bonus***

It wasn’t until she was in the tub that night, running the razor over her calf. She was taking a long bath before they cuddled up in their bed, a bowl of puffs to share as they watched something on a _locked_ channel. As she was rinsing off the razor, the glint of the silver blades caught her eye.

She never said anything, nor did she ask questions, but on the night of her birthday..she noticed. On Laserblast’s inner thighs and calves, the parts that would be covered by his costume were thin, pale criss crossing lines.

She hissed as the razor nicked her calf just above the ankle. Whimpering from the sting, she ran the afflicted spot under the warm water. How was that an appealing feeling? The question floated in her mind as she frowned, slowly working the razor over her leg again, taking care to not nick herself again.

That, however, was not her place to make assumptions about. There had to have been a lot more going on, though she apparently wasn't the person he wanted to open up to. No matter what they had said at his…award ceremony. 

She expected the usual pang of sadness that used to accompany the thought of the President of the Universe awarding Laserblast with medals once they had exhausted all means of looking for him. Today though, no such feeling came.

The ceremony felt hollow as she stood on the stage, taking the medals in his place. Her stomach had already begun to fill out and she could feel the stares, no one asked if it was Laserblast’s. It seemed they had already connected the dots. She was given a Neutral Zone Flag and two medals, one for his service to the Neutral Zone, and other for taking care of the Villain's lair….his lair. 

She sighed, rinsing off the rest of the shaving cream before beginning to fill the tub, adding an extra bit of oil and salt. Her body was sore from working in the garden and she wanted to be a bit limber for tonight, not just lay back and enjoy. She laughed softly to herself before slipping into the steaming water. 

She should find out if he wanted his items. Hell, he didn't even deserve them. She scrunched up her nose and rubbed her temple. Who all was there that day? Did he show up and hide in the shadows? To watch as she bawled and cried about losing him? To watch as his team members begged for him to come home or if anyone had any ideas on how to find him. With a deeper frown she leaned back making sure her hair did not get wet, no need to deal with that too. 

-

It had been raining, most of the crowd were under black umbrellas, and though everyone said it was not a memorial, no one was in their normal attire. Instead, most donned colors of blacks, purples, and red. 

"Today marks three months since Laserblast’s disappearance. In his absence today, I am awarding his partner, Silversparks with a flag of the Neutral Zone and two medals"

The President's voice droned on, remarking on his past deeds, but the tears that kept her eyes from taking in the sea of everyone around them, kept her from seeing the individual faces of those who supported her. All she had wanted was to tear down the signs, scream that he couldn’t be dead. It took all she had to just sit there and listen to the President tell everyone it will be alright, when all she just wanted to do was curl up and die… 

-

Carol leaned forward grabbing a cool washcloth and placing it over her eyes. She took a slow calming breath, the mixture of pain and anger where present but the grief was gone, the anger hurt more in its place. 

Was he there? If he had been alive this whole time and clearly doing well for himself, how was he 3 months later? Had his skin changed already? Would she even have recognized him? Clearly, if he had been there, she had not noticed him. Lad Boxman had been there, that she was sure of, that stout frame was easily recognizable. Rippy Roo, Foxtail, Doctor Greyman, to name a few of the Heros, she could even see Cosma, Dr. Weakpoint, and even Billiam Milliam.

Boxman had surprisingly not made a fool of himself. She had seen him at some of past POINT Assemblies, quickly causing it to disintegrate into chaos, only for Laserblast to swoop in and save the day.

She huffed out a sad laugh and pulled the washcloth from her eyes. 

She had wished the Villain would have that day. Pull out that remote he always carried and send junkfish raining from the sky, and to have Laserblast come in to destroy them. But no, she could only just barely see the short man lift something black to wipe at his face. 

She had almost sought Lord Boxman out…. To ask him… fuck what would she ask? Ask him why he was there, why he was so upset over a Hero? She wanted to blame him, to blame anyone. Hell, she had already blamed El-Bow and even blamed Foxtail and Doctor Greyman. Though she blamed herself most of all. She blamed everyone except whose fault it was; this was all him. All Laserblast's choice, and then his choice to be what he had become. He wanted to be a Villain, he wanted to carve out a name selling his tech to other evil-doers and then enlist his own name within their ranks. 

He had chosen to live in Evil rather than to just go on without powers, or without power as she felt he would have put it. He just kept going and, well she could only assume he found the power he had been craving. No way to ask a man on another planet. 

Maybe she was also upset that again another choice in hers and Lase- in the formerly known as Laserblast's life, had been taken away. She should have tried to talk to him when she dropped off KO. But he avoided her, sending Boxman down to get him. Should have reached out before… they went off the deep end. A low grunt came from her as she pulled herself up, pulling the drain plug before climbing out the tub and toweling off.

She needed to get out of her head. Some snuggles in bed with her hubby was just what she needed to push out the dark thoughts of the day. She won’t forget anything Professor Venomous had put her or K.O. through, and until he came and apologized to them, she couldn’t forgive him either.

* _Fin_ _n*_

*And Jake _*_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you guys enjoy? Bookmark the series to get updates on Laser's side of things. Enough interest and I amy even pull a third part and go from Boxy.

**Author's Note:**

> so what do you guys think? Where Boxy & Laser just /chitty chatting?/


End file.
